Why is looking forward to something better than the thing itself?
You spend weeks imagining a trip. You see the light on the water, the long dinners, and mornings with no obligations. Then you arrive. The flight is delayed, the hotel room is noisy, and you spend your second day answering emails. The trip was fine, but it did not match the image you carried.
The journey in theory
Samuel Johnson wrote about this in 1759. In The Idler, he noted that most people maintain a version of a trip in their minds that exceeds any real experience:
"He that travels in theory has no inconvenience"
— Samuel Johnson, The Idler, No. 58, 26 May 1759
In this imagined version, the inn always has a table and the road provides shade exactly when you need it. When the actual traveler sets out, "the best is always worse than he expected."
What the head leaves out
Johnson doesn't say the trip was a mistake. He says the imagined trip is made of different material. It contains no dust or delays. Anticipation is a specific type of pleasure built only from the details you choose to include. The gap between the image and the reality is useful because what you included while waiting reveals what you actually wanted. Perhaps it was rest or anonymity. The picture never had to deliver that.
If you arrive and never feel satisfied regardless of the event, that is a different matter. It has its own page.
Both journeys
Johnson does not suggest lowering your expectations. He places the two journeys side by side. What else did the trip I imagined leave out, besides the dust?
Epimelea is an app built around the existential school. The conversation carries over from one meeting to the next. The archive is encrypted on the device and belongs to the person who wrote it.
About the app: an AI therapist for long-term therapy
This page is about a school of psychotherapy. It is not medical advice and not emergency help. If you are in danger right now, contact your local emergency number, or find a helpline in your country at findahelpline.com.